Stigma and Mental Health
Stigma free?
I think about stigma a lot. We constantly see advertising claiming that places/spaces are “stigma free” but what does that actually mean? Places are neutral, it's the people in those places that make a place something, and people can claim anything they want without actually doing anything to back it. All you have to do is look at 2020 and all the people* (and companies) stating that they were doing things like “listening, learning, and growing” without doing a thing to investigate their own upholding of white supremacy, carceral thinking, and capitalism.
Given our penchant as people to make a lot of empty statements, how can we investigate our true feelings and thoughts around this? Mental health is difficult to understand because it is so often invisible to others. If you see someone missing an arm and they ask you for help putting on a coat, you would probably help them. You would not interrogate them on why they need help and why they cannot do it themselves. But if someone has both their arms with full range of motion and they ask you for help, you might be frustrated with the ask. Why can’t they do it? One’s thoughts might go something along the lines of: I do it everyday and I don’t need help, what is their excuse? Take it a step farther and they give you an explanation about how they are battling depression and therefore everyday tasks become mountains to climb so they just need your assistance. Do you immediately understand? Or do you help, but still wonder in your mind why they can’t just “get it together” because you saw them do it fine the day before? If you have never experienced something can you truly understand it and what does it even mean to truly understand someone else's experience in the first place?
What does destigmatizing actually look like?
One of the first steps to real destigmatization is understanding that we all have stigma in the first place. I was having a conversation the other day with one of my good friends who is also a therapist about their difficulties with their own child who experiences a lot of mental health issues. They were experiencing a lot of difficulties because of their own expectations of their child, based on their own background and experience. It's where we used the missing arm analogy. Mental health problems are often overlooked, misunderstood, and progress is not linear and it is hard for anyone to break that thinking, even those of us who think we know better. This conversation was only possible because we provide a space for each other without shame, much like the space a good therapist can provide.
So what does it take to really destigmatize mental health? Well that answer is much longer than this blog post but a solid first step is looking at all the ways stigma shows up on a daily basis. Whether it’s in jokes, advertising, or private thoughts-think about it, look beyond the surface. Find others who you can have a discussion with who won’t shame you for admitting fault but will challenge you to do better. We all have a lot of work to do, nobody is immune, so find that space and get to work!
*I am referring to white cis women here, a group which I am a part of